What a difference a few days can make.

Wow, my husband took the boys out yesterday, and they spent today at a friend’s house, and while they were gone, I cleaned. I just had baby girl, so had a lot of time to clean up. I should have taken before pictures of the playroom, I pulled out a kitchen trash bag worth of garbage, and piled the toys up, and having little guy make his bed, made a huge difference too.

20120729-173651.jpg
There is still lots to do, like my clutter catcher desk.

20120729-173747.jpg

I’ve made good progress on my sweater too, not all in the last two days, but I want to share, and I’ll have time to work on it, after supper. Here is baby girl trying it on, a week or so ago,

20120729-173953.jpg
And here it is today, I have a few rows left on the button band, and the sleeves to do.

20120729-174140.jpg

Advertisements

No motivation

I am fighting a lack of motivation, right now, I don’t really want to do anything, when I do things I feel proud of myself, and energized, but getting up, and moving has been very difficult. What I’m actually fighting is probably a bit of depression and a bit of burnout. They kind of go hand in hand for me, I try to fight off an impending wave of depression by working my butt off, only to burn out in a day or two, and crash hard, at that point, I either laze around for days, or I pull myself up by my boot straps, and fight again. I had five days off, and did absolutely nothing for four of them, then on Wednesday I got a call for help from my friend, which suddenly motivated me, and I worked my butt off. Yesterday I went back to work, in the morning, I had to fight myself to get just a few things done, and really wasn’t motivated to go to work either. Once at work, I took the easy way out, and did the simplest jobs to keep me busy, I did my job, but not up to my usual standards, and I was completely distracted. I really desperately need to do better today, this morning is a bit of a bust, the things I’m proud of? Getting my kids and I fed, and dressed in clean clothes, that’s it. I sat for an hr on the deck and knit one row on the toddler sweater I’m working on, and read two blog posts, I don’t know where the rest of the time went.
Well I’ve got 10 minutes to do something before I have to make lunch and get ready for work, my day-home provider invited us to come a little early, and have a tea party. Dh is working late tonight, so I’m bringing one of my heat and eat meals, that DH was supposed to feed the kids tonight, for her to add to their supper, they have been eating there a lot, I guess. I work till nine, and DH has a lot of late nights, so if the kids are there at supper time still, she feeds them. This is why we can’t use daycare

In this house

I found a song that always makes me want to cry, In this House by the Stellas. If you have never heard the song, you should, her voice is absolutely amazing.
The main part of the song that makes my eyes water, is, “I make room in my bed, even though you’re not there, when I’m sitting a the table, no one sits in your chair, I wait every morning for your footsteps on the stairs, but you’re gone.”
It makes me sad for two reasons, the first is, the thought that I know I would do that, if anything ever happened to DH. The second reason is, in a lot of ways, a lot of those things happen on a regular basis, he’s not there as much as I would like, when I make supper, I don’t wait for him, the kids and I eat without him, because he rarely comes in when I tell him to, sometimes it’s hours. Since I make him breakfast every day, I’m waiting for him, to come eat, while he takes his time getting ready for the day.

Raspberry Almond Coffee Cake

See, I promised, and am now delivering on that promise, here is a very yummy looking raspberry almond coffee cake. My cook tells me that it was yummy. We both wished that we still had raspberry plate scrapers to drizzle over the top of a piece.

20120708-165351.jpg

As is my usual task, when I find a recipe I think looks interesting, I have to start by multiplying the recipe, usually by 8. This time I used the sour cream to help me decide, I had 2L of sour cream and this made two of the large cake pans, that I’ve mentioned before. The pans I use at work are about two times the size of your standard cake pan. The comments on the original recipe said that it wasn’t quite enough for an 8″ pan, but doubling it made it very nice for a 9″. I learned long ago, that doubling a recipe for a 9″ pan gives me a nice standard size cake, so I multiply the recipe by 8 to make one large pan, this uses one liter, or 4 cups of sour cream. Since this was to be a snack, one large pan would have done it, but, I discovered we have an over abundance of sour cream, all ready to expire, so two pans it was, 16 times the original recipe.

We only had frozen raspberries, but that was ok, the comments had ideas on that, thaw and drain them first. Well, I don’t have time to thaw raspberries, so I toss them into a bowl, frozen, realize they look a little dirty, so run some water over them, to get the little flower petal things off, don’t tell me how crazy it was, it made me feel better. So I mixed up the batter, adding the wet to the dry, like the recipe calls for, though I always do it the other way around otherwise. It also says just till it’s wet, well that does not look good, I turn the mixer back on, add a splash of milk, and whip it, till it is a consistency I like, and call it good. Toss my raspberries with some brown sugar, and find I nearly have jam, they are mush, oops, oh well, moving on, I think. I spread out 1/2 the thick batter, into the bottoms of the pans, a well oiled hand helps here, or it will just stick, and not sit in the bottom. Then I divided the raspberries between the pans, and smoothed them out. I topped the cakes with the other half of the batter, smoothing it with an oiled hand again (I love the gloves we have to wear at work, and bought a box of the same nitrile gloves at the drug store, to use at home).
I then sprinkled sliced almonds on top, pressed them in, so they would be locked in place, and they were ready for the oven.
It wasn’t until I pulled them out, and saw this beauty, that I decided I had to blog about it, and took a picture, since I’m not supposed to have my phone at work.

And now the recipe, tell me what you think, I left the glaze off ours, to make it a touch more diabetic friendly. this is the original recipe, for an 8″ pan.

1cup flour
1/3 cup sugar
1/2 tsp baking powder
1/4 tsp baking soda
1/8 tsp salt
1/2cup sour cream
2 Tbsp melted butter
1 tsp vanilla
1 egg

Filling:
1cup raspberries
3 Tbsp brown sugar

Topping:
1/4 cup sliced almonds

Glaze:
1/4 cup icing sugar
1 tsp milk
1/4 tsp vanilla

My container garden

So I am completely excited today, with my tomato plants, I have two, the one I bought first, was a nice bushy seedling, a patio variety, that I planted in a pot, on my deck, it has done fairly well, and today I noticed it’s first flowers are beginning to open.

20120703-082455.jpg
The second tomato plant was quite different, it was the last one left, when I went back, after finding a topsy turvy at liquidation world for $2. I was not sure it would survive, all it’s 4 leaves had a hint of brown on them, and well, you know how neglected the plants are at grocery stores, it wasn’t all that surprising. But for $1 I took that sad little plant home, and lovingly planted it with my $15 bag of potting soil, because that is what I had at the house, well, it survived, it has even flowered, I count 5 sets of flowers, 4 of which haven’t opened up yet. In fact, I think we call this flourishing.

20120703-083051.jpg

20120703-083120.jpg
The before shot, rather sad and lonely looking, don’t you think?
And my pepper plant, it started off very well, I have 15 peppers, I don’t know what is happening now, the larger ones are about the size of my 2 year olds fist, and appear to have stopped growing, and now it’s dropping some of it’s flowers. There could be a few reasons for this, I tried giving it a shot of fertilizer, because my tomato plants weren’t ready for more, then a week later, they started flowering, and I forgot I had given the pepper plant some already, so I mixed it in the watering jug. When it was new.

20120703-083950.jpg
And now.

20120703-084020.jpg
And the last thing I am growing, is lettuce, which I dug out of the neighbors garden last week, and put in a pot, my garden, it’s it wonderful, I go out every morning to look at all my plants, and enjoy some quiet time.

Lucky to be alive

OMG, my boys did the scariest thing this afternoon I hire students to babysit in the summer, and I have a favorite, we haven’t had her over for awhile, because we havent been going out much. I’m working today, and she was babysitting. The kids had their 8 year old friend come over, and they asked her if they could go to his house, he lives on the next block over, they told her he lived two doors down. They told the babysitter that I let them go, so, with no reason not to trust my 5 year old, she let them. Well first off, this was a lie, they know they are not to leave the yard, I had left this unsaid, as she is a regular sitter, and even if she wasnt sure, my boys have been taught not to lie.

This whole thing wouldn’t have been a big issue had they gone to their friend’s house, but they decided to cross the road, which isn’t just any road, it’s a highway. I am super upset with the boys, and stuck at work still, DH is dealing with them.

We were supposed to go to the lake tomorrow, but we’ll see now, I’m not sure I want to take them now. Here is the beautiful lake lot we will be at, if we go.

20120629-175536.jpg

If you were watching someone elses kids, at what age would you trust them to tell the truth about whether their parents let them do something?

Catching Up

I am playing catchup with my laundry, and other household chores, the joys of a day off. My biggest two challenges are laundry and Dishes, they never end, and there is more than one part, wash, dry, put away. With my laundry I am good with washing and drying, but things tend to pile up at the put away stage, I usually end up waiting until I have no baskets to fill with clean laundry, I have 6 or 7, I’ve lost count, I know things are getting out of control when I start using the dirty clothes hamper to store clean clothes today I was at that point, it was packed full, and I had nowhere to put the clothes in the drier. So the adventure begins, I decide to sort out the kids clothes that they’ve outgrown, there is only a handful of clothes in the dresser anyway, so that is what I spent one morning doing, and I was only half done. I still don’t have a basket to use, as one is full of baby girl’s clean folded clothes, waiting to go in her dresser once I pull out the ones that haven’t been worn recently, one is full of DH’s and my clothes I found mixed in with the kids clothes, and one is full of the clean clothes from the laundry hamper, two still had not been touched.

By bedtime on tuesday, this saga was as good as done, all that is left is a couple bags of hand me downs, and the sweaters. Wednesday, it was the dishes, it was supposed to be my last day off, and I did it, got them all washed, and only clean dishes out were in the dishwasher, but today, I had another school function for little guy, and I fell off the wagon, on top of that, an hour before I would normally drop the kids off with the babysitter, I was on Facebook, and saw a comment that her grandma had passed away, so I texted her, to make sure she would still babysit, and she said no, nice to get some warning, hey? So I ended up not having a sitter, and had to call into work, it will be interesting to see what kind of trouble I get into, I was clear, that my babysitter had cancelled last minute, and I couldn’t find anyone else, but yeah.
I also got a lot of knitting done this week, finished the first hat of my sample knit, and am half done the second, two and a half to go, wanna see? Of course you do. Or so I hope.

20120621-185228.jpg
Felt really long near the end, but once I saw it blocking, so worth it, and it reinvigorated me to work on the rest.